By: Chinyanta Nkonde
Of course, feeling trapped is a state of mind; no one needs consent to leave a relationship. However, the sentimental attachments people build over time make things harder to let go of despite the relationship being hurtful , the feeling of suffocation or of having no choices builds up huge amounts of fear that’s often unconscious. People give many explanations for staying, ranging from how hard it will be to start over again, or finding someone they’ll connect with again.
We don’t want that day to come when we’ve invested so much and then we realize, we also invested in something that is going to hurt us real bad.
A trapped relationship consists of different situations, but some can be where two people, who were forced to end up together due to internal or external forces , that said they looked perfect together, try to display their love for one another, but in the end have many problems with communication, interest, and needs.
Feeling trapped in a relationship, can end up being even a toxic one, is something we rarely entertain. Because why should we? Who in the world would want to spend the night thinking, “hey, am I trapped in this unhealthy relationship? Is this relationship unhealthy to begin with?” Probably no one, until the signs are undeniable. When we’re in love, all we think about are the positive things.
Why should we look at our relationship through a lens and analyze what we truly feel?
Self analyzation helps us identify the incidents that screen dangers of staying in a particular relationship,because we don’t want that day to come when we realize our investment was all for nothing we torture ourselves with the thoughts of wanting to stay but yet killing ourselves just for approval of the multitudes . At times what looks good on paper can really be the most painful thing to bear . The perfection that people see in a couple and insist they stay together and get married , builds tension in the relationship cause damage to both parties involved.
Allowing people to make their own decisions and choices breeds better and healthier relationships in people.
The reason it’s called trapped is because both people had no time to explore their options and just ended up together due to certain circumstances. Even though these circumstances were special enough to make them go out, it’s not something that can hold them together. What holds them together now is guilt.
When your gut is telling you that something is wrong, you better believe it. You need to listen very carefully and see what it is trying to tell you. Our gut is never wrong, you know. When you refuse to talk so much about your relationship, that is one sign you’re in a not so healthy relationship. And you’re trapped with endless emotions that you can’t express feeling that the people around you will judge you
There are deeper, unconscious reasons that keep people trapped, usually fears of separation and loneliness that they want to avoid. Often in long relationships,
Denial of problems, including addiction, is another reason why people can get trapped in a relationship. They may rationalize, minimize, or excuse their partner’s behavior and cling to hope or occasional “good times” or expressions of love. They believe broken promises and hope things will improve ..“if only.” Often, they deny their own pain, which might otherwise motivate them to get help and change.
This is where you feel sorry for the person your with and continue to go out with them since is the “right” thing to do and not make you feel as if your an inconsiderate person and simply just “went put with them”. But just because it’s right thing doesn’t mean you should forsaken your own happiness to be in a relationship. That’s why you have so many couples arguing with each other, since they both express this feeling of a need that is not given. And “trapped relationships” do not give this need. I do hope though that you all take the time to analyze your relationships and see if you are genuine and love each other. Afterall people have other reasons other than my little observational shared wisdom right here.
I hope you’re not in a relationship of compromise, but that you’re happy with the choices you’ve made so far.
Remember always that a seed knows not who the planter is.
So choose wisely and put your own happiness first, because you matter.
